Top Five Things People Didn’t Tell Me About Winnipeg

October 3, 2013

1. There are all these towns with French names but if you pronounce them with a french accent people will look at you like you just murdered a puppy.  All the signs are bilingual and yet one mustn’t sound french. Say quoi?

2. There is goose feces EVERYWHERE, what is the goose population 17 times the national average or something.

3. Someone planned Winnipeg by letting their kid scribble all over a map which is why the intersections are all at strange angles with 5 roads converging on a single intersection.

4. Ya Mama

5. The Heat:  
     

       “Winnipeg is so cold”
       “Have fun in Winterpeg”
       “Make sure you bring a ton of warm clothing”

Why didn’t somebody say “Hey bring shorts and some sunscreen because in the summer it feels a lot like walking on the surface of the sun” I stepped out of my vehicle to a humid 35 degrees my first day in Winnipeg and  thought someone had launched a nuclear strike on Manitoba